Thursday, December 20, 2007

Daily Dollfaces

At first when I saw this picture on Dlisted, I was like "How did Michael K get a picture of me from the late 80's?" Gosh, it reminds me so much of when I was crying over a boyfriend, wondering how anyone could ever love me. I'd probably be blasting Foreigner. Err...its not me, it's Amy Winehouse.


Popbytes featured the latest cover of the National Enquirer-say it ain't so! Kelly Ripa and her husband on the verge of divorce? Note the picture of a crinkly leg belonging to Demi Moore.




Punky Brewster aka Soliel Moon Frye. She's BFF with Demi Moore, I wonder if she belongs to Kaballahalah too?




Katie needs a mink turban and a cigarillo to complete her Middle Aged in Hollywood look. Her eyes are screaming HELP ME.
Steven from Project Runway got booted after failing to renovate a large polyester wedding dress filled with clusters of sequins and pearls. Sadness! In the big screen version of PR, the role of Steven will be played by French Stewart. (photo from Project Rungay)



What is it with these actresses looking so beat down? I don't know if "actress" is the correct term for Jenna. She and Tara Reid need a detox followed by three meals a day from The Cracker Barrel and a ban on both suntanning and plastic surgery.





Tizzy Tisdale needs to stay home, prop her head up on a pillow and rest that nose. It takes months for a nose to heal from surgery. The tip will drop, swelling will subside and she will look different in a year.

Notice the person in the background who is offering Lindsay a sharpie and glossy photo! Meanwhile she looks highly uninterested. Linds looks beat, tired and not terribly healthy for her young age.Vanessa Hudgens is only nineteen but dresses like she's in her late twenties. When I was nineteen I was wearing two- toned stone washed jeans and oversized shirts with LA Gear hightops.


Everytime I see Christian from Project Runway, I am reminded of Mango from Saturday Night Live. I especially love Christian's coif. Very Anti-Ken Paves.

Nicky Hilton displays a leg-warmer boot hybrid. But what's worse is is very skinny and pointy knee! I hope there's food in them there bags.










Its Joan Van Ark! No, its Janine Turner! Its crazy eyes! No, it's Beverly Hills matron after a botox-chemical peel! No, its really Janine Turner.



I felt bad for her when I read that Hilary Swank lacks the "cuteness factor" to be the lead in a romantic comedy. She looks lovely here.





I have the same problem as Victoria Beckham- self tanning issues on the knees and tops of the feet. Notice the orange hue fades around those spots. Isn't that what the kids are for, to make sure the color is even?

Uma's mitts are huge! She's hiding mutant fingers! But remember her over-sized thumbs in the movie...



Even Cowgirls Get The Blues. Big thumbs, all the better to hitch-hike with.



Joe Simpson is encouraging a remake of Pretty Woman starring his daughter, Jessica as the hooker with a heart. But who can fill Julia Roberts' shoes? Julia just has something that Jessica lacks. I think it's called...talent.

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