Tuesday, April 15, 2008

Daily Dollfaces

If I dared to wear those short, tiny shorts Pamela Anderson has on, I would be arrested for indecent exposure. My thighs would be like a can of cinnamon rolls busting out from the container.

She is wearing ballet flats from the Amy Winehouse Crack Collection. I almost bought a pair to wear around the house but I know they would be disgustingly dirty within hours and I hate feeling like a filthy mess.

Reese Witherspoon and I could be best girlfriends. We both have two children, like to read, enjoy shopping, she dates Jake Gyllenhaal, I find him very cute...what more do you need for a friendship?

Michelle Williams looks totally normal pushing the stroller through the streets. She appears shlumpy and makeup free, just like a regular everyday kind of mom out with her child.

Can you imagine working out with Madonna? She'd kick your ass and mine with her situps, push ups, crunches, squats and everything else. Then she would make you feel bad for eating processed foods. Gwyneth and Madge probaby effect their British accents and talk about organic apples and how they hate the paparazzi. What fun!
Nicole Kidman looks wonderful! The color red suits her complexion and laying off the Botox...well, you can't really tell that she gave up her injections yet. Looking at the full length pictures of her, she does NOT look pregnant at all. Bloated but not six months pregnant. I want to see a big belly and a double chin!
Kelly Ripa and her son, both adorable. I want her shoes.
Teri Hatcher and her daughter have the same size legs and that is not good. Teri needs a good fifteen pounds on her thin frame. Eat your carbs Teri! Fat is your friend.

When I was pregnant, I invested in blue flared jeans and wore them all the time. Jessica Alba's pants remind me of the ones I had. I love her outfit but I wish she would smile more.

Cute outfit Fergie! I love the purple shoes.
Whenever I wear a shirt like hers though, I feel like a man.

The dress on Claudia Schiffer is so cute and I give her points for the leopard print but the tights? The shoes? No to both. A sexy strappy black heel would look one hundred percent better.
Oh goodness. The muscles in Anna Kournakova's (I cant spell it) legs are amazing. I'd love to have a fit muscular body like that but if I worked too hard at it, I'd lose what chest I have and that is a risk I cannot take. I rather lose fat from the hips where I have plenty to spare.